desperate and awesome.

I'm still far from caught up on catching up on tv but I just watched the season premiere of Desperate Housewives and am totally confused as to what the heck has happened since last season:

* Lynette's kids have doubled in age and are in high school now - they're SIXteen!
* Gabby is a housemom and has a chubby daughter (but still a blind husband)
* Edy's back and married.
* Susan is sleeping with her painter and Susan and Mike are no more because of a car accident. So sad.
* Bree's still married to Orson but Danielle came and took her baby back.

Oh- and I'm 30!

secrets & lies

I finally got around to watching what I THOUGHT was the season premiere of Desperate Housewives from last weekend and must say that I was sorely, sorely disappointed as it wasn't at all the season premiere but an extended 43-minute long recap of prior seasons. A long, detailed step-by-step recap of each and every desperate housewife's life. So not necessary.

So it turns out the premiere is actually tonight, but I won't be able to watch because I'll be at the Eagles-Giants game. Woohoo! Let's just hope I can manage to not get myself into as much trouble as I did the last time I went to a Giants game! Seriously.

slowly but surely

So it's a week after the fact and I have yet to watch the season finales of 24 or Lost. I know, I know, I need to be more on top of my tv, but I spent very little of my long weekend in front of the tv (weather was too nice!) and it's not like I'm REALLY behind since all my shows have ended and there's no more episodes to get backlogged on. So little by little I WILL get through all my tv shows.

I DID manage to sneak in the season finale of Desperate Housewives on Monday night (yes, also a week after the fact) and boy it was a good one! Lynette's got cancer ad her crazy mom shows up, Gabby gets duped into marrying the politician and is so pissed off about it that she decides to make out with Carlos at her wedding reception, who is also very pissed that Edie duped him into having sex with her. Susan and Mike FINALLY get married and that is pretty much the only happy ending story of this episode. Bree returns looking very pregnant but turns out to only be pretending to be pregnant to cover for her delinquent teenage daughter who got knocked up by Edie's nephew and is now in a hideaway nunnery waiting to give birth to a baby that they'll then pretend belonged to Bree. Oh, and speaking of Edie? She totally hangs herself after Carlos dumps her! Granted it was with a very dainty looking silk scarf and I don't really see how that could hold her weight but well, you know.

HDTV

Didn't I say I was going to start blogging again once I got my HD tv and cable all set up? Hmm, I've had it about a week and a half now, and am finally getting around to writing about it. I have been too busy basking in the glory of my super cool HDTV. I don't even know how I watched tv before this - everything just looks bigger and better now. I have taken to watching football games I don't really care all that much about for the sole reason that they are in HD. Sad, but true. In fact, I'll watch almost anything in HD now. I haven't really gotten around to building up a huge inventory on my DVR list yet, but am working on it. I did watch Desperate Housewives last night though - intense! I don't care what anyone says, Lynette is a badass. What a crazy episode, and especially intense in HD!

HD is good times, I tell you!

May Sweeps

I don’t tend to get too worked up over tv shows (sometimes), but I guess I had a moment of weakness because I sure had a good cry over the season finale of OC. I think that after waiting all season for it to happen, the Kirsten-the-drunkie storyline ended being a little more than I could handle, and I’ve never seen the Cohen household quite so serious.

As for Trey – whew, he’s had quite a rough season. First he gets tortured by CTU – almost twice, and then he gets shot in the back by Marissa Cooper…

For those of you who for some ghastly reason have NOT been watching the OC – now is your chance to catch up – during the off season, season two of the OC will be airing two episodes a week, 8 and 9pm on Thursday nights.

Btw, am I supposed to now believe that Dana/Zach is Mike the plumber’s son on Desperate Housewives? Zach creeps me the f#%* out. Although watching him beat Martha Huber’s sister over the head with a hockey stick was rather entertaining.

All these season finales, so sad to have all my shows ending, what the hell am I going to watch all summer?! (aside from baseball. and all those new really bad reality shows coming out.)

Deep-fry this, bitch!

Between Maisy getting arrested for being the neighborhood prostitute, Gabrielle doing laundry in the Jacuzzi and stealing the portapotty, and Lynette dueling with the head lice mother, I just can’t even imagine where I was on Sunday nites before Desperate Housewives came into my life. What a relief to finally have them back.

I know I’ve said this before, but if you are not watching Arrested Development, you are missing out on some of the most ingenious television writing I’ve seen in a long time. George Bluth Sr. is quite possibly the funniest sitcom character I’ve encountered since George Costanza. Tobias was wearing a shirt that looked very much like a Ben Sherman shirt that I’ve seen B Sauce wear, which for some reason I found really amusing. Add Ben Stiller, aka guest magician Tony Wonder, and you’ve got one damn funny show.

I also recently checked out Life on a Stick -- deep frying your a-hole boss’ office in hot dog on a stick batter is always funny, and the American version of The Office -- British humor doesn’t translate quite the same and I’m inclined to stick to the BBC version, but yet, there’s something inherently funny about refrigerating someone’s stapler into a jello mold, british or american style.

Oh yes, and of course there’s nothing better than racial drama between model wannabes. The black girl with the attitude gets sent home, even though one of the white girls looks like a dead fish in her photo shoot and Tyra proclaims it to be the worst photo even taken in the history of America’s Next Top Model. But considering the show is less than two years old, I don’t know if that is saying very much. I also particularly enjoyed watching Tiffany make a big stink about not drinking anymore, proceeding to order 3 or 4 glasses of wine at dinner, and then puking right at the dinner table.

And next time on ANTM: Flesh eating bacteria?! The fun never ends.