now they can make babies!

It’s down to the final three teams, and what a race! Teams go from London to Jamaica, do a limbo roadblock, and then a build-a-raft detour which Ron & Kelly suck at, allowing Uchenna & Joyce catch up. Rob & Amber’s taxi got pulled over by the cops and I laughed, but then Uchenna & Joyce get a flat tire and I don’t laugh. Ron & Kelly end up at the first pit stop first and Uchenna & Joyce end up last and get all their money and stuff stripped from them and I am sad because Rob & Amber had never had their money and stuff taken away from them. Then there’s some onion chopping task which looks like a really sucky chore, a golf detour in which I learn everyone sucks at golf except for Uchenna. And is it really necessary to show Rob stripping down to his underwear when he changes in and out of his golf clothes? Team Survivor get on the first flight to Puerto Rico which they are smug about as usual, Ron & Kelly on a later flight, and then Uchenna & Joyce are on an even later flight. Lucky for us, the sugar place they have to go to doesn’t open til the next morning, which allows for bunching so everyone can catch up and be all tied for first again. Then there is some jumping-off-the-bridge roadblock, but Rob & Amber can’t find the bridge because they’re too busy being full of themselves. But then they somehow catch up on the highway on the way to the airport because Rob drives like a maniac, Ron & Kelly fall behind because Kelly can’t tell left from right, and Team Survivor sneak on to an earlier flight and are all smug again until somehow Uchenna & Joyce manage to weasel their way onto the same flight, which greatly un-smugs Rob & Amber. Ron & Kelly end up on a later flight and that pretty much counts them out of winning the race because there are no more bunching opportunities. Rob & Amber can’t find the cigar shop because they are not thinking in Spanish so off Uchenna & Joyce go to the finish line in Ft. Lauderdale! For a minute, they try to make you believe that Uchenna & Joyce are going to lose because they spend so much time begging for money to pay the cab driver. But alas, Team Survivor is still looking for that damn cigar shop and the only team of the remaining three that I didn’t hate wins the million! Quote of the race, by Uchenna, upon winning: “Invitro here we come, and if that doesn’t work, adoption!” umm, yeah – TMI. But either way, thank goodness they won because I think I would have slit my wrists if Rob & Amber won. Oh yeah, and they don’t even show Ron & Kelly looking for the cigar shop, they were that far behind. I wonder if they’ll do a Dr. Phil special on these two also.

The next season of TAR – the FAMILY edition!