Back to your regularly scheduled programming

I’m back from my break and my goodness I don’t even know where to start. Someday you should ask me about my trip to California and the traumatizing events that took place within the first hour after I landed in San Jose. This is all after my adventurous long weekend that I spent drunk and/or hungover more than 50% of the time. I think it’s all probably more entertaining than my tv blog. But this is a tv blog, and not Cindy’s Diary, so back to business.

I checked out a bunch of the new reality shows over the weekend, and here are my thoughts:

Hell’s Kitchen: Watching Gordon Ramsey torture these wannabe chefs is almost painful. But not as painful as watching him torture the customers too during the so-called grand opening of the Hell’s Kitchen restaurant. I know that all reality shows have some elements of being totally staged, but really, could this show be any more scripted?
Dancing with the Stars: My guilty pleasure reality show for the summer. I totally get a kick out of watching celebrities learn to dance and then compete against each other. Slightly ashamed that Joey McIntyre has stooped to this level, but hey, more entertainment for me. I mean, Joey McIntyre, John Hurley (aka J. Peterman), Trista… this is an all-star cast here. My only problem with this show is that it is hosted the America’s Funniest Home Videos guy, and he just irks me.

Hit Me Baby One More Time: Simply awful. I can’t even expend any more energy talking about it.

Beauty and the Geek: Quite possibly going to be the funniest new reality show of the summer. The collection of beauties and geeks they found to participate on this show are in a class of their own. The hotties are hot but stupid, and we’ve got everything from a lingerie model to a dancer for the Sixers to a “life size Barbie model.” I swear. On the geek side, there are Mensa members (Jeff Jacobsen anyone?), the guy who has never kissed a girl, and the Vice President of the Dukes of Hazzards Fan Club. I kid you not. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

The beauties and the geeks pair up and each week the geek/beauty couples compete against each other in ridiculous challenges. For week one, the girls are tested on 5th grade material (such as naming 3 states that start with the word “New” – and believe it or not, she was only able to come up with one) and the guys are tested on their dancing skills. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so much.

There’s even some scandal for those of you who are into that. One of the hotties develops a crush on one of the geeks that she is not paired up with and ends up making out with him. This of course causes raging jealousy with the geek she IS paired up with. The drama!

This is some seriously entertaining stuff guys, you really should watch, it’s a good time. What else did we expect from the guy who brought us Punk’d?